Battle of the Sexes – Are Men or Women Better in Bed?

A glimpse into the surprising sex & sleep habits of America

For many people, the talents they exhibit in bed are a source of pride and bolstered self-esteem. It’s a huge stroke to the ego to think you’ve got it going on and can please your partner like no other.

But which gender edges ahead in terms of their prowess?

Guys come out of top when it comes to sleep stars

If we want to address the G-rated version of the “who’s better in bed?” question, let’s talk about sleep quality for men versus women. The Better Sleep Council gives the edge to the guys based on the latest research, but, and it’s a big one, only by 3 points according to the data. Guys said that they greeted the morning feeling refreshed and ready to seize the day. This is despite them looking to booze to help them fall asleep more frequently than women.

Women tend to understand the importance of sleep more and put a higher priority on getting a good night of rest more than men. But they also tend to feel more stressed about not getting enough snooze time. And they’re the ones who report being exhausted more often. Is that because women are more likely to allow kids and pets to share their bed, potentially decreasing the amount of restorative sleep available to them?

Women come out on top with the other “S” thing we do in bed though…

Sleep isn’t the only thing we do in bed and research gives women the edge in that other “S” category. In one survey from dating site, LoveAgain.com, 60% of respondents says women were superior. Perhaps it’s their giving nature or their desire to make others happy. The findings also said that more than half of women were confident in the bedroom and were currently feeling fulfilled by their sex lives. Sadly, for the guys, the results were less impressive. They were less self-assured and were not as happy with the status of their sex lives.

Contentment with intimacy can depend on location too. Men and women in the West had the highest sex drives in the country with 52% saying that they had high sex drives. The national average was about 49%. When it comes to frequency, those who live in the Midwest need some help with just 11% saying that they had sex at least once a week – the lowest rate in the nation.

When sex & geography converge

Men who are seeking a woman who rocks their time in bed the most should look to women in the Southwest. They had a higher opinion of themselves as intimate partners than ladies anywhere else in the country. About 67% of the women in the region reported that they were superstars in the bedrooms. We kind of wonder if it had something to do with the guys in states like Texas where 67% of men were plenty proud of their “package.”Bigger in Texas? Maybe there’s some truth in that…

Overall, though, men across the country thought they were better lovers than their female partners. Dr. Fran Walfish, a Beverly Hills-based family and relationship psychotherapist, author, The Self-Aware Parent, and co-star on Sex Box, WE tv, has a different opinion. “Good things come to those who wait,” she says. “In general, women take three to four times longer than men to arouse during foreplay and reach climax. Often, their patience and endurance is rewarded with more intensity, power and multiple orgasms.”

That’s not true for the guys. Men tend to want to rush to climax. They feel the need for speed more than the ladies. For both sexes, it’s important to note that the best sex happens on a firm mattress so shop accordingly.

What makes someone better in bed

There are a number of contributing elements that affect both sexes, Walfish points out. “Sexual history, age, hormones, medication and substance usage, emotional issues (anxiety and depression), and actual skill are factors that affect one’s sexual experience.”

The bottom line is that the most important trait that draws the line between the ‘better’ in bed is how you feel about your partner and how much generosity you’re ready to put forth in bed, according to Dr. Walfish. “In other words, if you care deeply for your partner you will want to pleasure him or her. The giving is what makes you the better one in bed.”

Whether it’s sleep or sex, can we all just agree that both are important to our health and sense of wellness? Good loving and good sleep make both sexes winners.

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